The LGB part of the abbreviation references sexual orientation, while the T represents gender identity. One of the most misunderstood ideas is the difference between sex, gender, gender identity, gender expression and sexual orientation. Most people are aware of the basic definitions that compromise the abbreviation of LGBT however there is a lot of terminology under this umbrella that you might not be as familiar with. To have a good discussion with your child about this topic, it is important to understand certain terms. In order to create an environment that embraces curiosity, normalizes difference, and encourages respect, it’s important for parents to do some self-reflection and self-education.” This usually speaks to the parents’ own discomfort and lack of knowledge about the subject. “I’ve seen many parents shy away from these conversations, mostly out of fear that this will lead to discussions about sex that they feel may be inappropriate for the child’s age. “Breaching the topics of sexual orientation and gender identity with a child can be an anxiety-provoking thought for many parents,” says Thompson.
I spoke with my colleague, John Thompson, MSW, in the Division of Adolescent and Young Adult Medicine, to create a guide on how to talk to your child about LGBT issues. Unfortunately, there aren’t many resources to help parents learn how to have these conversations with their kids in an informative and non-judgmental way. By talking with your child at a young age about sexual orientation and gender identity, you can teach them the value of empathy and respect for others, as well as open the door for any future conversations regarding their own identity ( we will dive into this topic in our next article).
However, kids still look to their parents for guidance about gender identity and sexual orientation. Social media has been a catalyst for social change, acceptance and inclusivity among preteen and teenage youth. They may hear certain words or terms at school or on TV, but not know what they actually mean. Children may learn about LGBT people through their friends, in the media, or by knowing an LGBT adult in their lives. Kids often ask their parents questions that they feel uncomfortable about or unprepared to answer. The next article will focus on how to discuss gender and sexuality with your children if they come out to you as LGBT or questioning.
* This is the first of a two-part series on how to talk to children about LGBT issues.